


What should never be

by superpotterdiaries27



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-06
Updated: 2016-06-06
Packaged: 2018-07-12 14:12:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7108498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/superpotterdiaries27/pseuds/superpotterdiaries27
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean knows there’s something he’s forgetting but he can’t quite place what it is. </p><p>Or:  </p><p>The high school tale that turned out to not be a high school tale at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What should never be

Dean walked into the kitchen and went to grab the cereal. As he poured the cereal and added in milk into his bowl, he heard a familiar voice.

“Are you going to the party?” His stepsister was already finishing her breakfast and now had decided to bug him about some kind of party. He hadn’t even noticed her sitting there; he was very tired from staying up late to study yesterday.

“Good morning to you too, Jo,” Dean yawned as he slid into the chair across from her.

Jo huffed and glared at him. “Good morning, Dean.”

“Wow, Joanna Beth, you really know how to greet people.” Dean smirked as he dug into his breakfast.

Jo pointed her fork at him with narrowed eyes and said, “Don’t call me that. What are you, my mother?”

“Actually, I am.” A third, familiar voice interjected before Dean could make a comeback. The sound of Ellen’s slippers on the hardwood should have announced her arrival in the kitchen far earlier, but Dean and Jo had been too caught up in their bickering to notice.

Jo smiled, warm and easy. “Morning, mom.”

“Good morning,  _Joanna Beth,_ ” Ellen said and then turned to Dean, “Morning, Dean.”

“Morning, Ellen, nice uh- .” Dean hid a smile he noticed what Ellen was wearing. “- jammies.”

Ellen glanced down at the plaid pajamas that had reindeer drawn all over them. “Your father got them for me, and it was a sweet gift, god knows he’s the sweetest out of all of you.” Ellen narrowed her eyes.

Jo scoffed, “Eugh, mom, we’re glad that you and Bobby got married and all, but that’s just too much info. Dean agrees with me, right Dean?”

“I don’t necessarily think-” Jo kicked Dean’s leg under the table and he winced. “Um, yeah, Ellen, it’s nice and all, but kind of gross.” Dean pulled a face, only half hoping he was being convincing.

Ellen just laughed and ruffled Dean’s hair. “You’re a sweet kid. Now excuse me, I have to go take a shower.”

“Bye, ma,” Jo chirped.

“Bye,  _Joanna Beth_.” Ellen grinned at them over her shoulder as she made her way down the hall.

Jo rolled her eyes, but said nothing until she heard the telltale click of the bathroom door closing. She shifted her focus back to Dean. “Now are you going to answer the question?”

“About the party…?” Dean scratched the back of his head, stalling for time as he tried to remember. It wasn’t much of a surprise when he drew a blank. “Eh, see it would help if I knew what party you were talking about.”

Jo sighed. “Ugh, everything is so difficult with you Singer men. Hold on, let me get it-” She rifled through her backpack until she grabbed a piece of crumpled paper out of it.

“- Here it is,” Jo replied. She smoothed out the paper and slid it across the kitchen table for Dean to look at.

“Get your milt on at the Milton party,” Dean read out, looking back up at here with confusion. “Who the fuck are the Miltons?”

“Uh, Jaime Milton, ring a bell, Dean? The girl you’ve been obsessing over since kindergarten?” Jo quipped, staring at him like he was an idiot.

“Wait, those are the same Miltons?”

Jo crossed her arms, shaking her head at him. “God, Dean, you really do live under a rock.” She snatched the paper back and stuffed it back into her bag. “Anyway, I’m going and that means you’re going with me or I’ll tell Bobby all about that swimming camp incident you had way back in freshman year.”

Dean groaned, “Ugh, fine, I’ll go. But I gotta say, they need to work on their catch phrases a little bit.”

Jo snorted. “Maybe you can pitch your ideas at the party, see you in the car, Dean-o.”

* * *

Dean was putting his dish in the sink when he heard someone walk up behind him in the kitchen. He turned to find Ellen had changed into her work clothes, her hair still damp from the shower.

“All ready to go?” She asked as she jammed two pieces of bread into the toaster and turned to take the jam out of the fridge.

Dean nodded. “Yeah, Jo’s going to drive us. She needs the car after school. Plus, she could use the practice.”

Ellen snorted. “That’s true, but don’t let my daughter hear you talking about her driving skills. You’ll never hear the end of it.”

Dean snickered, nodding in agreement as he walked over to shove all of his notebooks and books into his backpack.

Normally, he’d have everything ready the day before, but his math teacher had given them way too much homework the night before and he had barely had time to finish it, let alone everything his other teachers had given him. Between that and Jo telling him about the party, he was pretty sure they were going to be late if he didn’t hurry.

Almost like she was reading his mind, Jo honked the car horn out front. “Guess that’s my cue to go,” Dean mumbled, mostly to himself.

Dean slung his backpack over his shoulder, starting when a hand grabbed his arm. He spun around, “Wha-?”

“Dean, before you go, I want to ask you something,” Ellen interrupted as she took a bite of her toast, scrunching up her nose and adding more jam on it. Dean tried not to laugh, knowing that if Ellen was stopping him to talk to him about something, it was probably important.

“Uh..” Dean crossed his arms and tightened his lips. He didn’t like where this was going. “What do we have to talk about?”

Ellen sighed as she sat down and patted the chair next to her, “Come sit with me.”

Dean slowly walked to the table, unsure if he really wanted to sit down. Ellen rarely ever talked to him like this and his gut feeling was telling him he really didn’t want this conversation to continue. Also, Jo was probably planning his murder with every passing moment.

“Dean, I know that Jo mentioned Jaime but are you sure it’s her you like?”

“Of course, who else do you think I like?” Dean exclaimed, feeling his neck warming up. He scratched at it, hoping Ellen wouldn’t notice.

Ellen quirked her eyebrow, “Uh- you know someone with the same black hair and blue eyes but maybe more masculine.”

“Are you implying that I am interested in Castiel Milton, socially awkward twin brother of Jaime’s? Because if so, that is so  _far_  from the truth.” Dean snorted.

Ellen nodded but there was a strange look in her eyes that Dean didn’t quite like. “Okay, honey, I guess if there’s nothing to talk about, then you can go to school. I just-” Ellen wiped her mouth and then added, “- I know it was tough after Karen died and I know I’m not your mother but I hope you know that you can always come to me if you want to talk.”

Dean heard a honking again, followed by Jo yelling, “You better get out here or you’re driving your own ass to school.”

Dean shot out of his seat quickly and said, “Thanks, Ellen but there’s really nothing to talk about.” Then he ran out the door and to the car, as he knew Jo was not one to joke around and that if he didn’t get out of the house in the next few seconds, he would end up walking to school.

“Drive safe and have a good day at school. Bobby will pick you up from school.” Ellen yelled after him as Dean opened the passenger door.

The last thing Dean heard before he shut the door was, “And remember you can always come to me if you want to talk.”

Jo sent a murderous glare Dean’s way as he climbed into the car and said, “What took you so long?

“Nothing.” Dean muttered as he put on his seatbelt.

“What the fuck do you mean nothing?” Jo started to pull out of the driveway. “I was waiting a heck of a long time for it to be ‘nothing.’”

“Just drop it, Jo.”

Jo scoffed, “Fine, whatever.”

They drove the rest of the way to school in silence.

* * *

Once they had parked, Jo grabbed her bag from the backseat and got out of the car. Her coffee tumbler was placed temporarily on the hood of the car as he slung her bag over her right shoulder and slammed the door. She locked the car and grabbed her coffee, turning to find herself alone. She saw Dean across the schoolyard, already deep in conversation with Ash and Charlie.

“Nice going, Singer, didn’t even tell me that you left the car.” Jo called as she neared the school’s front yard.

Dean rolled his eyes. “Took you long enough to notice.”

Jo punched him in the arm and Dean rubbed the sore spot, glaring at her. “What the hell is wrong with you? First my leg, now my arm?”

Jo reached over and pinched Dean’s cheeks, “Aw you big baby.”

Charlie snorted, “How cute, Dean, you’re the baby of the family.”

Dean rolled his eyes and Asher laughed. “Oh come on, Dean, it’s not so bad, being siblings with Jo.”

“Step-siblings,” Both Dean and Jo corrected, immediately turning to glare at one another.

“It’s basically the same thing. You guys are still siblings.”

“No, it’s not,” Dean muttered.

“Yes, it is,” Jo responded.

“No it’s –" Dean famous phrase of the day was interrupted as Jo stepped in and said, “Sorry to interrupt your magnificent convo but I have to go. See you at practice, Charlie.”

Asher said bye to Jo and then turned back to his conversation with Dean. When Jo looked up, Charlie winked at her before joining the conversation as well.

Ignoring, the warmth spreading to her cheeks following that wink, Jo walked through the school’s front doors. She had more important things to worry about, one of which was her AP Chemistry exam and she couldn’t let anything distract her before the exam.

* * *

“Hey so now that Jo’s gone, I wanted to ask you something,” Charlie commented, ending Dean and Ash’s discussion once and for all.

“Yeah, what?” Dean asked absentmindedly.

“Well, the parade’s coming up and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me?”

Dean gave her a questioning look. “What parade?’

Charlie rolled her eyes. “Um, the pride parade, the only one I’ve been going to since forever.”

“Isn’t the parade just for LGTBQA people individuals?” Dean asked.

Charlie gave him a pointed look. “Yeah, Dean and I’m pretty sure you’re one too. You know the B doesn’t stand for butthead.”

Ash snorted.

Meanwhile Dean responded to Charlie’s statement. He had to hold back a fist as he answered her. “I’m not bisexual. I only like girls, why do you people keep on insisting I am anything but straight?”

“People? What people?” Charlie asked curiously.

Dean shook his head; he did not want to get into this conversation right now. “Never mind. I have to go to class.”

Then he scurried off to his class and the last thing he heard was Charlie yelling after him, “Don’t you worry, your secret’s safe with me.” Then he heard Ash and Charlie burst out laughing.

Dean ignored them and continued on his way to his class. It was honestly beyond him why everyone kept assuming he was anything but straight or that he liked Cas. Sure, they used to be the best of friends when they were little, but that was back then. And so what if Dean noticed that Cas had great hair, really blue eyes and that he was way too smart for his own good. It didn’t mean anything at all. 

* * *

Cas had decided that he would go to school earlier that day as he thought he could use the extra time to study for his upcoming math final. Plus, he knew that his twin sister, Jaime, had taken the car so that she could hang out with her friends before school. Therefore, he decided to walk to school that day.

So far, everything had been going well. That was until he bumped into someone as he was reaching his locker. When Cas met eyes with them, he cursed his luck. Of course, he just _had_ to bump into the most popular jock at Lawrence High.

“Watch where you’re going, fag.” Zach, the captain of the football team snarled as he shoved Cas back into the lockers. His friend, Michael, laughed and then grabbed the books Cas was holding and threw them on the floor.

Great, the day had just started and it was already off to  _such_  a wonderful start. Now Cas wished that he had taken the car. That way he wouldn’t have been early and he wouldn’t have run into Zack and his posse.

Sure Jaime might have been mad at him, which probably would’ve resulted in her pulling a prank but he could have lived with that. Better than dealing with the jerks at this school.

Well, not dealing. Not really.

Cas cowered, raising his hands to cover his face, awaiting the blow that always came next. But when nothing came, he squinted up and saw Dean Winchester, another popular jock, the school’s heartthrob punching the living daylights out of Zack.

Once Dean saw that Zack could no longer hurt Cas, he held out his hand and helped pull him to his feet.

“You alright?” Dean asked and Cas could only nod in response. Just as Dean was about to hand him the books that Michael had thrown on the floor, everything fell silent and a stern voice rang out. “What is going on here?”

Looking up, he noticed that it was their principal. He had a scowl on his face and his arms were crossed. Dean knew right away that there was no way he was getting out of this particular conundrum.

When none of the boys responded, Mr.Shurley decided to take matters in his own hands. He helped Zack up first and said, “Zachariah, please go to the nurse. I will deal with you later.”

Once the boy had left, Mr.Shurley turned his attention to the other two. “Now, Dean and Castiel, please follow me to my office.”

Dean groaned. He did not need another trip to the principal’s office. What were his parents going to say?

Cas’s eyes were wide with fear. He had never been to the principal’s office before. He had never even met the principal himself prior to today.

As they walked with Mr.Shurley to his office, Cas wondered where Michael had gone. He figured that the scrawny boy had quickly crawled away from the scene when he saw Dean laying into Zack and reckoned that he didn’t stand a chance. The rat.

Once they had taken a seat inside the office, Mr.Shurley closed the door before sitting down himself.

“So,” He cleared his throat and added, “would either of you like to tell me what was going on there?”

Dean looked at Cas, who still seemed to be in a state of shock and knew that he would have to be the one to explain.. “Nothing, it was nothing, sir,” Dean mumbled, not meeting the expectant eyes of the principal. Maybe if he denied anything had happen, he could escape without a punishment.

Mr.Shurley gave him a pointed look. “Are you quite sure that that was nothing?”

“Yes, Mr.Shurley,” Dean said with as much conviction as he could manage.

“Well, if you say so-” Mr.Shurley coughed. “-but I must say that I personally believe  _everyone_ has a story to tell.” The principal took a sip of his coffee, regarding them both over the rim before setting it down. He swallowed and added, “Anyhow, you are still getting detention-”

“But, sir-” Dean interrupted, quickly falling silent when Mr.Shurley held up his hand.

“No buts, Mr. Singer, fighting another student is unacceptable behavior, no matter what the reason may be and you will serve detention.” Finally, he turned to Cas. “Mr. Novak, I presume that you were not involved in the fight, correct?”

 Cas shook his head, finding his voice, “No, sir, I was not.”

Mr.Shurley nodded. “Good, just as I expected.” Upon seeing that Cas still had a frightened expression on his face, he said, “Do not worry, Mr. Novak, you are not getting a detention.”

At Cas’s sigh of relief, the principal had to stifle a laugh.

“Very well, you both may go,” Mr.Shurley stated but then as they were about to exit the principal’s office, Mr.Shurley called both of their names. When the boys turned their heads, he added, “I hope it will please both of you that I will have a serious discussion of using derogatory terms with Zachariah and that he will definitely face serious consequences.”

Both Cas and Dean nodded their approval, taking Mr. Shurley’s small smile as permission to finally leave.

“Fuck, I can’t have a detention again, my dad’s going to kill me,”Dean ranted, when they were out of earshot, glancing at Cas when he remained quiet. “Hey, are you alright?”

Cas resisted the urge to roll his eyes. “Yes, I am quite alright, I am not in your damsel in distress.”

“Jeez, you don’t have to be rude, I was just trying to help,” Dean retorted, taken aback.

“Whatever, Singer, I have to go to class,” Cas snapped as he walked away, leaving Dean behind.

“Yeah, see you around,” Dean called after Cas, honestly hoping he would never see the kid again. 

* * *

The rest of the day went by pretty quickly. During lunch, Dean had the _oh so wonderful_ experience of calling his dad and letting him know that he was going to have stay late at school because he had detention. Bobby in turn didn’t wait a second in telling Dean that he’s a damn idjit for getting another detention. Dean explained the circumstances surrounding the detention, which did make his dad lighten up a little, though he knew he was still in some trouble. Bobby promised to pick him up once he was done serving his detention.

* * *

Detention was interesting to say the least. When Dean walked in, there was no one else there besides the school gym teacher, Mr. Jefferson, who instructed him to sign in and to go sit at one of the desks. He was then told to get a paper out and write an essay on what he did wrong.

Later, as he was working on his essay, a skinny young boy, whom Dean reckoned was a freshman wandered in. Dean couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something familiar about him.

“Mr. Winchester, so nice of you to join us,” Mr. Jefferson said and then passed the boy the attendance sheet.

“Wish I can say the same,” The boy responded and uncapped his pen before using it to sign in.

Mr. Jefferson huffed a mocking laugh. “No matter what you may think, Mr. Winchester, your sarcasm will get you nowhere.”

“Maybe it’ll get me out of here.”

Dean had to bite his cheek to stifle a laugh. He knew that he should really get back to writing his essay if he wanted to get out of here early, but it was quite entertaining to watch the boy and his gym teacher argue.

The teacher’s nostrils flared. “Now listen, here you little-” Whatever he was about to say Dean would never know because at that moment, Mr. Jefferson’s cell began to ring and he snatched it out of his bag. Upon reading the caller id, he excused himself and told both boys to not go anywhere.

Once the teacher was out of earshot, the boy mumbled, “God, what an ass.”

Dean laughed heartily. “Couldn’t agree more.”

The boy’s eyes widened. Dean couldn’t tell if he was surprised that Dean heard him, or that someone had responded to him.

Now that he had finally taken a seat, Dean was able to place what about the boy was so familiar

“Hey, you live across the street from me, don’t you?” Dean asked.

The boy stared blankly at him as if Dean were a complete idiot. Then he grinned, “Wow, golden boy’s got brains and brawn. How surprising.” The boy took a paper out of his book bag, but unlike Dean, he did not start writing his essay. Instead he chewed on the cap of his pen and stared unseeingly at the blank paper. Seemingly all of a sudden, he placed his pen to paper and began to draw.

Dean held up his hands, “Hey, I ain’t no golden boy.”

The boy smiled cheekily. “Whatever you say.”

Dean peeked over the boy’s shoulder to see what he had been drawing. All he saw was a weird star with many different symbols and squiggly lines.

“Hey what’s that?” Dean asked, intrigued.

“Dunno, think I saw it somewhere.” The boy continued to doodle, but then stopped and added, “Can you please not breathe down my neck?”

Apparently Dean had overstepped boundaries. Yet again. “Sorry,” He apologized as he turned back to his seat.

The boy did not reply, but that did not discourage Dean. Something about this boy made him want to know him more. Something about him made it seem as if Dean had known him his whole life. Logically, Dean knew that didn’t make any sense, but that wouldn’t stop him from trying to get to know him.

Dean decided for a casual, “Hey, what’s your name?”

“What’s yours?” The boy retorted, not taking his eyes off his drawing.

“Dean Singer, what’s _your_ name?”

The boy sighed. “Fine, my name’s Sam and before you make the stupid joke, it’s not short for Samantha.”

“Wasn’t going to say that,” Dean replied, although he had had an inkling to say something exactly like that.

They sat in silence for a few minutes as Dean continued to write his essay and Sam kept drawing. When Dean couldn’t take the quiet anymore, he asked,

“You going to the party?”

For the first time since he started drawing, Sam put his pen down and turned around to face Dean. “What party?”

“The Milton party.”

“Oh, that party,” Sam said dismissively and turned back to his drawing. “Nah, not my type of scene.”

Dean raised an eyebrow. “And what _is_ your type of scene?”

Sam laughed. “A scene that involves me smoking a joint.”

Oh, so Sam was _that_ kind of partier.

“Well, if you do decide to go, at least you’ll know someone there.” Dean smiled reassuringly. For some reason, Dean had the strong urge to be there for this boy and to protect him at all costs. Maybe they had been brothers in another life, who knew.

Sam looked back again, confused. “Who?”

“Me, doofus.” For a second, Dean thought he’d misstepped and Sam was going to start a fight. This wouldn’t have fared well for either of them, as both of them would probably be sent to detention again, but Sam just smiled.

The way Sam had turned caused his necklace to pop out over the top of his collar and the strange brass charm dangling from it caught Dean’s eye. Dean had just opened his mouth to ask him about it when Mr. Jefferson came back through the door.

* * *

Later, as both boys walked out of the classroom after detention, Dean asked Sam if he needed a ride home. It was the least he could do seeing as they lived right across the street from each other.

Sam shook his head. “Thanks, man, but my dad’s driving me and my brother home.”

Something about Sam speaking about his brother felt wrong, but Dean shook it off. It was probably nothing.

* * *

When he got home, Dean stepped out of the car before his dad parked the car in the driveway. He hoped Ellen wouldn’t be as angry with him for getting another detention if he entered the house with his dad as back up.

While Dean was still in the front yard, he saw that the Winchesters had arrived home at the same time as he and his dad had.

From where he stood, he could hear Sam’s dad yell at Sam and his brother. From what he gathered, the man had been saying that both Sam and his brother were a waste of space and that they were wasting his time in finding the answer to who had taken their mother away.

Dean didn’t really understand what the man meant by that.  _Who_  had taken their mother  _where_? As far as he knew, Sam and his brother lived with their father because their mother had died.

So to him, it didn’t make sense that the man was saying that someone had taken his wife. Maybe he meant it figuratively.

“I cannot believe him.”

Dean turned to the source of the voice, surprised to see that it was Ellen. She had walked outside while his dad was parking their car. Dean prepared himself for the lecture that he knew he was going to be given, but astonishingly her face did not hold any signs of anger.

“What?” Dean asked.

Bobby walked up to them. “I agree,” he said, “That’s bullshit what’s John’s spouting. It’s like he expects his sons to be soldiers or something.”

Dean was pretty sure that it was the first time he had heard Bobby curse in his presence but decided not to mention it.

“That ain’t no way to raise kids-” Bobby shook his head and added, “I mean god knows how torn up I was after Karen died-” Dean watched Ellen squeeze Bobby’s hand gently “-But that’s no way to raise your kids.”

“Yeah and what’s worse is that he constantly forgets he has another son, honestly I don’t even know what his name is,” Ellen said, a frown forming on her face.

“I think his name’s Adam,” Dean supplied, blinking in surprise the moment it was out of his mouth.  _How_  had he known that? As far as he could remember, he had never met the other Winchester boy.

Luckily, Bobby and Ellen didn’t seem to notice as they had decided to walk toward their front door, discussing how their day had gone.

Dean followed them inside, trying to piece together why this day just kept getting weirder and weirder.

As Ellen opened the door, Dean glanced back at the Winchester house. He watched John and his sons walk through their own front door and he again felt a sense of déjà vu. Dean couldn’t place it, but Sam and Adam’s father looked so familiar that it was eerie.

* * *

The rest of the week had gone by pretty quickly and it was finally Friday. Things eventually had gone back to normal. Though he did see both Sam and Cas around the school, he didn’t feel a sense of déjà vu or had an urgency to punch someone in the face who was annoying or teasing Cas. Dean considered that a win. He was finally back to being his normal self.

Dean decided to go to the party that Jo had told him about after all. It had been quite an eventful week and he thought it would help loosen him up.

Despite his detention earlier in the week, Ellen and his dad still let Dean go to the party with Jo. Ellen, however, warned both her daughter and Dean that if she could smell even the tiniest bit of alcohol on them after they got home, they would not be allowed to leave the house for the next month. Dean and Jo rolled their eyes at Ellen, behind her back of course, but nonetheless abided by her rule.

When they got to the party, it was pretty early so there weren’t many people there yet. Jo saw some of her friends from cheerleading so she went to greet them, leaving Dean behind.

Dean decided to wait for his friends on the couch and took his phone out of his pocket, hoping to avoid awkward conversation with Jo’s friends, but within seconds, the couch squeaked as someone sat down next to him.

Dean looked up from his phone and saw that it was the head cheerleader, Meg Masters. She smiled slyly at him and said, “I know you, don’t I?”

Honestly, she didn’t know him. Not really. Sure, they ran in the same circles and saw each other at these parties, but they had never really interacted before that. And seeing as their senior year was almost over, Dean didn’t feel like making any more friends, but he didn’t say that. Instead he said, “Yeah, I think so. Meg, right?”

She smiled again, “Yep, that’s me. And you’re Dean, the hero who beat up Zack for annoying that weirdo rebel.”

Dean wouldn’t say he was a hero. It  _wasn’t_  like he had helped save the world. He just got into a fight with an asshole that thought he was better than everyone else. His brow furrowed as he registered the other half of what Meg had said.

“Wait, hold up,” Dean muttered, arching an eyebrow, “Rebel?” Was Meg talking about the same Cas?

Meg shot him a strange look. “Yeah, Castiel is quite the rebel.”

“I dunno, he doesn’t seem the type,” Dean replied with an equally strange look. Honestly, Cas seemed like the type of guy that wouldn’t do much of anything. From what Dean knew, he was quiet and mostly kept to himself.

Meg smirked, “Oh trust me, that kid could rebel if he really wanted to.”

Suddenly Dean thought he heard someone say,  _“I’m hunted. I rebelled and I did it- all of it- for you.”_ But he shook his head. There is no way anyone ever said that. Dean hadn’t even gotten one drink yet so it was clear to him that it wasn’t the alcohol responsible for making him hear that voice. He decided to blame hearing that voice on the stress of final exams and his upcoming graduation.

* * *

After excusing himself from the conversation with Meg, he went to the bathroom and splashed some water on his face.

Right when he looked up at the mirror, he felt like there was someone standing behind him and for some unknown reason he had the need to say,  _“Cas, we’ve talked about this, personal space?”_

The words tumbled out of his mouth, perfectly, as if he’s said them a million times before. But he hasn’t though. Dean’s never said those words to Jaime’s twin brother before.

What the hell was happening to him? Was he finally going crazy?

Dean decided to leave the party early. He lied to Jo and told her that he wasn’t feeling well, not completely untrue, and that he wanted to go home. Jo wanted to stay a bit longer, which he understood so he ended up walking home alone.

As he walked home, Dean thought of all of the weird things that had happened to him this week so far. He hoped the incident at the party was the last he was going to see of crazy town because he didn’t think he could handle any more of it.

* * *

As usual, the weekend passed by too quickly. Thankfully, Dean hadn’t experienced any more craziness that he had encountered the previous week.

He had arrived early to his history class and he knew that finals week was rapidly approaching, so he decided to take his notes out and skim through them, mentally noting what he would have to study in more depth when he got home.

Eventually boredom took over him and he decided to scan the room to see if Jo or Charlie had already come in. He didn’t find either of them and he supposed they were going to come in right as the bell rang as they often did so.

What he did find, though was Sam at the end of the classroom, who had turned around in his chair to chat with his friends. And that surprised Dean quite a lot. That was because Dean was a senior and Sam was a freshman. Plus, this class was an honors section.

Dean didn’t mean to be condescending but the impression that the kid had left upon him made it seem like Sam did not give any shits about school. The kid seemed to be way more into smoking joints and art than into school. Also, Dean didn't remember seeing him in class before today.  Therefore, Dean was quite surprised to see him there.

He decided against waving at him and turned back in his chair to face the front of the classroom right when their history teacher, Mrs. Day, came in. She threw her bag and all of the papers and books she had been holding onto the desk. Then she adjusted her glasses and went to write the do now and the agenda of the week on the board.

Although the class hadn’t started yet, Dean started copying down the notes. As he glanced up briefly at the blackboard and back at his notebook, he couldn’t help but smile.

Mrs. Day was a great teacher. Despite history being a quite boring subject for many, she managed to make it quite interesting. Learning about ancient civilizations had never been interesting before he took Day’s class.

Upon seeing the project assignment she had written on the board, he got a bit excited. He’d always been interested in legends and myths and he considered the fact that he would be able to write about them for a class a major win. So he was excited about a school project, sue him. His life (minus last week’s fiascos) was generally boring.

Right as he finished copying down the notes, the bell rang, and just as Dean expected, Charlie and Jo strolled into the classroom, both holding a cup of coffee and giggling. They made a beeline for their desks, and once they were seated, Mrs. Day began her lesson.

“As you can see, I’ve written the final project assignment on the board, which you will work on in pairs that I’ve already chosen-” Everyone groaned at this, earning a patient, but tired smile from their teacher before she continued. “As I was saying, the final project assignment is on the board and it will be in lieu of the final exam.”

This brought on a mixed chorus of cheering and groaning, and if Dean was being honest, he was a bit disappointed, as he had already started studying for the exam. Everyone fell quiet when there was a firm knock on the door.

Mrs. Day went to open the door and smiled (though Dean thought it was a bit forced) at Mr.Shurley as he stepped in.

Mr.Shurley turned to Mrs. Day and cheerfully said, “Hello, Jessica.”

“Chuck, so nice of you step by.” Mrs. Day’s lips thinned and Dean had a feeling Mrs. Day didn’t think it was  _so_  nice of the principal to step by. “What brings you by?”

Instead of answering Mrs. Day’s question, he faced the class and said, “Just wanted to tell you seniors that the finish line isn’t for a few more weeks and to remind  _all_  of you that everything you do has consequences.” Mr.Shurley smiled eerily and glanced around the room.

Following his gaze, Dean saw that he had been looking at Sam, who was sitting way back in the classroom and was rolling the chain of the necklace he had on between his fingers while frowning down upon it. Dean wondered what that was about but nonetheless turned back in his seat, only to see that Mr.Shurley had already left.

Mrs. Day sat back at her desk and reorganized her papers, tapping them on the desk to straighten them and bring the class’s attention back to her. Once everyone had simmered down, she started listing off the pairs she had chosen for the project, which immediately ramped up the mixture of excitement and anxiety in the room. Dean really hoped that he would be paired up with Charlie or Jo for this project.

“Mr. Singer and -” Dean perked up at this name as the teacher scanned the sheet she was holding and called out another name, which unfortunately for him was neither Charlie’s last name nor Jo’s but was in fact Sam’s.

“Mr. Winchester,” Mrs. Day called.

Dean cursed his luck. Sure, the kid had seemed nice during Friday’s detention and Dean felt a strange sense of pull toward him, but he had no clue if Sam would be a good partner, or if Dean would have to pull all of the weight himself. All he knew about him was that he was most likely a stoner and that he liked to draw.

A few minutes later, Mrs. Day had finished calling out pairs and students were beginning to move their stuff to sit near their partners so that they could start working on the project. Though he desperately wanted to sulk, Dean knew he couldn’t do that so he got up from his seat and started walking toward Sam. As he walked towards the table near Sam, he decided that maybe Mrs. Day wasn’t such a great teacher after all. Because who in their right, would want to work on a school project with Sam Winchester?

* * *

After school, Dean sat in the library, nervously fiddling with his phone. He and Sam had had decided that they would start working on the project as soon as possible. Being that Sam was a freshman and had a longer schedule, Dean had to wait in the library for him.

Despite living across from each other nearly their whole lives, neither boy had been to the other’s house. If Dean was being quite honest, he was actually quite scared to find out what he was going to find in the house. He knew logically that it would just be a regular house, just like any other house he had been to so far.

However the exchange that Dean saw between John and his sons the other day had left him feeling queasy and made him want to go running for the hills rather than enter their house.

Regardless, he knew that they had a project to work on and he was going to push his weirdness aside and act as normal as possible. So what if Sam felt like a brother to him. So what if John seemed similar. So what if he knew the name of Sam’s brother when no one else seemed to know. It didn’t _have_ to mean anything.

* * *

Sam’s house was interesting, to say the least. Rather than there being family photos, the walls were decorated with portraits of weird symbols, symbols that quite honestly looked like witchcraft.

Sam noticed the weird expression on Dean’s face as the older boy looked around the house and said, “My dad’s really into the supernatural stuff.” He laughed, “He believes in all that crap.”

“Crap?” Dean muttered, still looking around the house and not really paying attention to what Sam had been saying. Even something about the house seemed familiar. It felt like _home_ , or what home would feel like for a very small time.

“You know, ghosts, witches, demons, all that crap.” Sam shook his head as if to show how ridiculous he believed his father to be.

Dean tried to shake the weird feeling he had gotten off and said, “Oh yeah. Why?”

Sam sighed, looked quite annoyed and Dean thought he wouldn’t answer but then the younger boy surprised him. “Well after my mother died, he was driven by so much grief that he sort of got the idea that something supernatural had caused her death.”

“Oh,” Dean said, not sure what else he could add.

Sam gave him a sad smile, “Yeah, oh.”

* * *

Later after they had eaten lunch, they were in Sam’s room researching for their project and Dean, who had been surfing the Internet on his laptop to search for ideas for their project had looked up and noticed that the boy was yet again twiddling with the string of his necklace as he stared at his laptop screen.

“Sammy, where did you get that?”

Sam glanced away from his laptop. “What?”

“The necklace, ” Dean explained, “Where did you get it?”

“My dad gave it to me.” Sam said, then paused and after a few seconds added, “Wait did you just call me Sammy?”

Dean ignored the second question and said, “What’s the necklace for?” He figured it had to have some significance for Sam to wear it. He doubted the kid was one of those guys who would just wear jewelry for the heck of it.

This time Sam turned completely away from his laptop. “Well, my dad said it’s supposed to protect against supernatural forces- ” He scoffed, “Plus it’s supposed to glow when a deity is nearby.”

Dean laughed. “Oh yeah and has any deity been nearby?”

Sam smiled, “No, but- ” His smile disappeared quickly. “Weirdly enough it did glow in class today. Probably a malfunction or something.” He turned back to typing on his laptop. 

And right at that second it hit Dean. This wasn’t real. Whatever universe he was in, it certainly was not his. As he came to terms with the fact that all of this was fake, he swallowed past the lump in his throat as an awful thought occurred to him. Even in an alternate universe, Sammy managed to get the crap end of a stick. There was no time to feel bad for this made up version of Sam. He needed to get back to the real world where Sam and Cas were waiting for him. 

He slammed his laptop shut, gathered his stuff and got up. He started walking to the door when he heard Sam yelling back after him. “Where are you going?

“There’s somewhere I have to be.” Dean said shortly, not stopping to explain as he walked down the stairs. What was the point of explaining, anyway? This Sam was not real and if Dean managed to solve whatever’s going on, this Sam will cease to exit.

“We have to finish the project.” Sam called after him, running down the stairs to catch up with Dean.

Dean turned around and noticed the hopeful look in Sam’s eyes. No matter how much he felt the need to protect and help this boy, he knew deep down that this Sam wasn’t really his brother.

“No Sam, you have to.” He said and walked out of the house.

As he walked across the street to his so-called house, he remembered more of what had transpired right before he got sent to this _wonderful_ universe. Killing Death. The darkness emerging. Running to the car with Sam and then being shrouded with the darkness. _Shit_.

How was he going to get out of this place?

* * *

Once he had gotten out of Sam’s house, he ran across the street back to his house and now he was pacing back and forth in his bedroom (correction: fake Dean’s bedroom) and contemplating on what he was going to do.

From his interactions this week, it was clear to him that this Sam was not the real Sam. Ellen, Bobby, and Jo also clearly did not know this was an alternate reality. But what about Cas? The last time Dean had talked to Cas, or well the teenager Cas, he seemed to believe this was reality too. He hadn’t talked to the kid since that day at the principal’s office. Maybe something had changed since then. Maybe Cas had realized that he wasn’t a high school senior but was in fact an angel of the lord. Dean could only hope.

* * *

Finding Cas’s house was not as hard as Dean had thought it would be. After looking up Cas in the town’s directory and getting his address, he used Google maps to help him plan his route.

Once he had the route memorized, he sped out of the house and jumped into his car as quickly he could.

Luckily Cas didn’t live far from Dean in this reality and Dean was able to find his house fairly quickly.

He ran up the porch stairs and rang the doorbell frantically. He really hoped that Cas’s parents weren’t home because he had no time for pleasantries and judging by the empty driveway he had had a second to glance upon as he ran up the stairs, he had an inkling feeling that he was right.

Dean saw the door being open and straightened his posture. Even if this was an alternate reality, he didn’t want to make a bad impression on Cas’s family, as he really needed to talk to him. And what good would it do if Cas’s parents took one look at his crazed expression and shut the door in his face? He would never get out of here.

Yet again fate seemed to be on his side because it was Cas, and not his parents who opened the door. However, Cas didn’t open the door completely and only stepped out of the house a bit.

“What are you doing here?” He asked.

“I need your help with something.” Dean said, then looked straight into Cas’s eyes and added, “Can I come in?”

Cas crossed his arms and frowned, “Help with what?”

“I’ll tell you inside.”

Cas hadn’t let up and still had a defiant look on his face. “No, Dean, tell me now.”

Dean rubbed his face and ran his fingers through his hair. He felt like ripping his hair out. He decided being blunt was the best tactic at the moment. “Fine, I’ll tell you. You’re an angel.”

Cas had a smirk on his face now. “Are you trying to flirt with me, Dean?”

Dean threw his hands up in the air. “No, you’re an actual angel of the lord. You have powers. You can heal and smite with just a touch. And you’re not really a teenager, this isn’t your reality. C’mon Cas, deep down you know.” Dean placed his arm on Cas’s shoulder, “Deep down you know who you really are.”

“That’s a nice story you got there, Dean but I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Cas said and then he shifted his gaze to look past Dean. And suddenly, Dean was brought four years back when he watched Cas stand in front of him and lie through his teeth, feeding bullshit to Dean and Sam and Bobby and expecting them to believe it. And with one glance at Cas’s face, Dean had known that that Cas was lying. Just like he knew now.

“Stow the bullshit, Cas. I know you know.” Dean retorted.

Cas sighed and opened the door to his house fully and said, “Come in, Dean.”

* * *

It seemed look a good plan when they first thought of it. Now, now well Dean was freaking out that Cas had vanished into thin air.

Chuck who was standing on his lawn in only a bathrobe and a mug in his hands had just snapped his fingers and said, “Let’s go inside to chat.”

Dean refused to move from his spot on the lawn. “What did you do to him?”

Chuck smiled slightly, “Don’t worry, Dean. He’ll be fine.” He turned and walked up the stairs leading up to his house.

Dean realized he had no choice but to follow. Walking in the house, he followed Chuck into the kitchen where the former prophet had his back to him as he was pouring some hot water from the teakettle and saying, “Would you like a cup of tea?”

“No.” Dean snapped. He gritted his teeth and spat out, “I’d like to know where Cas is.”

After Chuck grabbed a teabag and placed it in the mug, he turned back to Dean and smiled that creepy smile of his again. “I told you, don’t worry, he’s safe and he’ll be fine.”

Dean sighed, “Just tell me where he is.”

Chuck rolled his eyes and muttered under his breath, “You Winchesters are really persistent, you know that.” He scratched the back of his neck, and said, “Fine, he’s back home.”

“Home? As in heav-” Dean started off but couldn’t finish because Chuck interrupted him, “No, he’s at your home, you know the bunker.”

Dean narrowed his eyes, “How do you know about the bunker?”

Chuck smiled thinly, “Dean let’s cut the act, I know why you’re here. They don’t call me the almighty for nothing.”

“You bastard.” Dean yelled angrily and then he swung his fist, which collided with Chuck’s jaw. Then he pulled his fist back, shaking his hand off, feeling as if his hand had just collided with a rock.

Chuck rubbed his jaw, as if that had hurt him, that fucking bastard! One pro tip Dean just learned: don’t try to punch god in the face.

“May I explain before I get another punch in the face?” Chuck asked.

Dean glared at Chuck, who had taken to sit at the kitchen table. “I don’t care who you are. I don’t have any respect for you. How could you fucking leave the world? All of us? Did you think that we weren’t good enough for you to stay and you just decided you would just up and leave?”

Chuck bowed his head, glancing down at the tea in his mug. “Dean, I didn’t know. I had forgotten.”

Dean crossed his arms. “What?”

Chuck looked up from his mug. “After Lucifer fell- Chuck grimaced, “-I decided I wouldn’t meddle in any more affairs and I left. I erased all of my memories and lived on this planet. But then Amara resurfaced-”he gave Dean a pointed look “- I felt a shift in the Earth and I knew who I was.”

“So what, the first thing you decided to do was throw me and Cas into this lovely universe, just for the heck of it?”

“No, Dean you did that yourself.”

“What?” Dean exclaimed.

Chuck bit his lip. “Dean, I ask you to think about what you had thought about before the darkness enshrouded you in the car.”

And then he thought back to that moment. Him and Sam had just exited the bar and then they were in the car. And right then as the darkness was taking over, he had one thought:he had wished Sam hadn’t been his brother and then he wished he hadn’t known Cas. If he didn’t know them, he wouldn’t have been in this mess. Charlie wouldn’t have died. He would’ve lived a normal life and he wouldn’t have ever been wrapped up in this hunter lifestyle.

“Shit.” Dean said, rubbing his hand over his face but then he looked back at Chuck and glared at him again, “But just because I wished that, doesn’t mean I made myself come to this universe.”

Chuck smiled, “No, you’re right. That was me. I wanted you to see that you couldn’t change things no matter how much you wished you could. Dean, I’m sorry to say this but you and your brother will always have a destiny to uphold.”

Dean waved his hand at Chuck, “Yeah, yeah all that destiny bullshit, yada yada yada. It must run in the family to throw people in alternate dimensions when your children have tried doing that once or twice already.”

“They were probably trying to show off.” Chuck laughed. “My children always did like to compete for my attention.”

Dean ignored Chuck’s statement and said, “So will you get rid of it?”

“On one condition, Dean.” Chuck smiled slyly. Dean was beginning to think the guy never stopped smiling.

“What condition?” Dean gritted out through his teeth.

“I want you to tell my son how you really feel about him.”

Dean’s neck and ears reddened and managed to stammer out, “Whaat? What do you mean?”

Chuck rolled his eyes, “Dean, they don’t call me the All Knowing for nothing. Please don’t be embarrassed, quite frankly I am finding it kind of unnerving.”

When Dean said nothing in response, Chuck continued, “Why do you think I had you punch Zack? I wanted you to be reminded of what you did, back in the bunker. I wanted you to realize you weren’t mad at Zack or really, at Cas but that you were mad at yourself. I wanted you to see that because maybe if you saw that, you would understand and you would take the right step in direction in talking to Cas about this. Maybe I’m overstepping right now but I haven’t been around in a while and I’ll admit, Cas is one of my favorite ones and I want him to be happy.”

Dean glanced away. He didn’t want to think about what happened that night. It was bad enough he had killed that kid; he had hurt Cas, the only person who he had considered to be close to him after Sam. Every day, the guilt ate at him. Sure Cas had healed himself and the physical reminders of what Dean had left behind were gone. But the mental ones? Den was sure that the angel would never be the same. And he didn’t want to ever open the conversation about it.

“How are you so sure he’ll want to listen?” Dean said quietly.

“Because Dean, he listens to anything you say.” Chuck said as if it was the simplest explanation. “Now are you ready to go back to your own world?”

Dean nodded but then a thought occurred to him, “One more thing before I go. What was with the whole Mrs. Day thing?” Dean asked curiously.

Chuck laughed. “She’s a character on a show I watch, I couldn’t resist.”

Dean rolled his eyes. Then Chuck came closer to him and pressed two fingers against his forehead. Dean knew it was time so he closed his eyes.

Within seconds, when he opened his eyes, he was standing in the war room of the bunker where Sam was sitting at a table with a thick ass book in front of him and notepads strewn all over the table.

Sam looked up and before he could say anything, Dean strode across the floor to where Sam was sitting and enveloped him in a hug. “Sam, I’m so fucking glad to see you.”

After Dean let go of his little brother, Sam smiled up at him, “Yeah, you too. After the darkness got us, I wasn’t sure where you had disappeared to so I called Cas and he wasn’t answering so I’ve been doing research for the past week to see if I could find you.”

Dean grimaced, he felt bad that his brother had been in this world and hadn’t know where he or Cas had been. “Well, Cas was in the same place I was.”

At Sam’s questioning face, Dean retold the story of his adventures in the ever so glamorous alternate universe.

“Also just so you know the darkness is not our problem anymore.” Sam yet again had a confused face on and Dean grinned and said, “I’ll explain later. Now I have to go find Cas.” He clapped Sam on the back, “It’s great to see you after the week I’ve had.”

Dean ran up to the guest room, hoping this conversation would go smoothly but knowing with his luck, it would probably be an utter disaster. As he walked up to the guest room, from the open doorway, he could see that Cas was lying on the bed and frowning down at a magazine (National Geographic) he was holding in his hand. Dean bit his lip to stop himself from grinning.

God, that dork was adorable. Dean thought but then shook his head clear of these thoughts. He and Cas needed to have a serious conversation.

“Hello Dean” he said before Dean even entered the room. Then he sat up and sprang into action, “Did it work? Did he agree to fight it?”

“Yeah, he’d said he do it. But I uh- ” Dean scratched the back of his neck, “Cas, I got some stuff I need to tell you.”

Cas glanced at Dean with furrowed eyebrows. “Like what?”

Dean was never much for talking so he sat down next to Cas, grabbed Cas’s face and placed a kiss on Cas’s lips. Dean wasn’t going to lie, the kiss wasn’t speculator and he didn’t feel fireworks. In fact, the kiss was quite awkward, their teeth knocked against each other and they couldn’t quite figure out a good angle. But Dean didn’t care because it was with Cas and he was glad he had done it.

When they finished kissing, Dean rested his forehead against Cas’s and said, “I’m sorry, Cas, I’m so sorry. What I did, God that was wrong.” A tear spilled out, then another one and then Dean was shaking as sobs wracked his body.

Cas put his arm around Dean and pulled him in close, “Shh, shh Dean, it’s okay. I already forgave you and you know why? - ” Cas felt Dean shake his head, “-Because I know your soul and when you had the mark, it was not you, not really.” Cas planted a kiss on Dean’s forehead and rubbed Dean’s shoulder gently.

“That night, I was so angry, God, I was so fucking angry and I just wanted you to feel at least half of what I felt.” It spilled out before Dean could think of what he was going to say. Cas always had that effect on him.

Dean sniffled and wiped his eyes with the back of his sleeve. “God, I don’t deserve you.”

“Don’t ever say that, Dean. I love you and you will always deserve me, no matter what happens.”

“Me too,” Dean mumbled. Then looked up and sheepishly said, “I mean the love thing, I uh love you too.”

Cas chuckled, “I figured.”

Dean rolled his eyes but then smiled. Then he remembered something and asked, “Can I ask you something?”

“Anything, Dean.”

“Why did you lie to me in that world at first?”

Cas sighed, “I thought I wanted to stay there. It seemed like life was easier there, simpler, if you will. No apocalypse, no war, no purgatory, no darkness. And I didn’t want to leave at first. But then I realized that in that world, we didn’t love each other, we weren’t even friends. And Sam wasn’t my friend there either. And then I knew that I should help you because even if we do have a lot of problems, I’d still rather be here with you and Sam than in that universe.”

“Oh,” Dean said simply.

“Dean, I’ve told you before, we’ve been through a lot. And I love you and you love me but-” Cas paused, choosing his words carefully, “- Maybe we should talk things through before we start something?”

Dean nodded, “Yeah I don’t think we need to rush into things. We should definitely wait as we need to work on our communication.” _Understatement of the century._ Dean thought but didn’t voice it aloud.

He and Cas were definitely going to work on their communication skills before they jumped into a relationship.

“Work on our issues, so to speak.” Cas added and smiled heartily at Dean.

“Also we could work on bettering the kissing.” Dean grinned.

Cas laughed. “Then we’ll work on it.” He intertwined their fingers and said, “Together.”

“Together.” Dean agreed and smiled back at Cas, pulling him in for another hug.                                                                                   

**Author's Note:**

> Hello,  
> I started writing this fic after episode 10x23 had been released. I however stopped working on it and put it away as I had other fics to work on. This summer, I decided to finish it. I wanted to note that I did not know about Amara being the darkness or that God (Chuck) was actually going to show up in season 11 as season 11 had not aired when I started this fic. Although, I know now that the darkness is Amara and that she is God’s sister, I still went with my original plot and therefore, the version of the darkness is different from the canon version of the darkness that they gave us in season 11.  
> Please review.  
> Thank you,


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